I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
