When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Randomize