Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
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