Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
This show inspires me to have sex in space
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Randomize
