He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
