didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
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