Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
I want to make a zoo with you.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
The feeling are messing with the penis
Sorry about my life...
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Randomize
