i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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