in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
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