I can tuck mytits in my pants
seriously iPhone. stop autocorrecting all my fucks into ducks. you're making all my strong worded texts look harmless and adorable.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
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