i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
how drunk are you?
Several
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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