I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Randomize
