i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
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