I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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