you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
