She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
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