I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip πππ
Your skills amaze me
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