She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
You were trust falling into bushes
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
