IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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