Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
