so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
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I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
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its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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