is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
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