there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
i think im in europe. pls send help
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
