You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
