oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
