Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
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