My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Every concussion has its silver lining
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize
