if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
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