I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Randomize
