Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize