I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're using joints as your birthday candles
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
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