My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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