did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
