remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize
