belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
Randomize
