Welp...herpes.
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize
