do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
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