she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
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