I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
