this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
