On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
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