I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
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