How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
