Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
