Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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