he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I think we might need a safe word for this...
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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