We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
you told grandpa to call you daddy
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Randomize
