Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
