shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Randomize
