we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
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