scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
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